Archive Ask Phoebe

My first thought is that she may have problems with your Extraversion preference. Because Extraverts often talk more, especially those with Extraverted Feeling dominant preferences (EFJs), because that is the primary way they relate to people. It is my experience that they (EFJs) don’t use email as much as the phone is because they prefer …

Question from an ESFJ: Why does my ISFJ sister always make me the problem in our family? Read More »

Answer: The easy answer is the Thinking – Feeling difference because your logical decision-making approach is what others hear you using when you speak. However, your Feeling values for your type are introverted (Fi) so they are lived rather than expressed outwardly. You treat people as you want to be treated, hopefully with respect and …

Question from an INTJ: Why does my INFJ son-in-law accuse me of not having good values? Read More »

Answer: The quick explanation is that he needs facts to satisfy his preference for Introverted Sensing (Si). He also has an Extraverted Thinking (Te) logical approach so you may get an argument because he doesn’t think about human behavior as much as you do and can present a “devil’s advocate” approach.  My suggestion is that you …

Question from an ENFP: Why does my ISTJ husband question my judgment when I talk about patterns of behavior? Read More »